By Christine

Houston, we have a heartbeat, which means I’m officially 14 weeks pregnant. I would post a belly shot, but I don’t have a true pregnant belly yet, just the same rolls pushed out a little bit further.

Earlier this week we returned from our two-week vacation, where we spent one week with each side of the family. As we both come from long lines of happy eaters, most of the vacation featured food as the main attraction. There was ice cream, smores, chips and guacamole, crackers, and fancy chocolates. And lots of bread.

I spent the first week abstaining from flour and sugar for the first two meals of the day and eating whatever I wanted for dinner. Within a few days my maternity pants were sliding down my hips as I was significantly less bloated. I found it wasn’t too much of a sacrifice to fill a stalk of celery with onion and chives cream cheese instead of crackers, or to fill mini bell peppers with guacamole instead of chips. I also made elaborate sandwiches with romaine lettuce in the place of bread.

The second week was spent with my side of the family, which includes a zoo of grandchildren, all under the age of six. I was so exhausted as to be comatose by this point, so I just ate whatever was handy, be it bagels, crackers, and even cereal, but I skipped the nightly ice cream in which everyone else seemed to be bathing.

The day after we returned from our trip I weighed in at two pounds lighter at the doctor’s office. The midwife made no comment.

Since then my husband and I have been abstaining from sugar and flour altogether and plan to do so five or six days a week for the forseeable future (with my midwife’s blessing). I like to call this the pussy pregnant version of the primal diet. I will still eat dairy, oats, corn, and honey on a regular basis, because, well, I’m pregnant damnit and I don’t so much experience as hunger as FAMINE IS IMMINENT FEED ME NOW BITCH AND NO CUCUMBERS WON’T CUT IT.

I’m also realistic. Our backyard is bursting with heirloom tomatoes right now and while I’ve prepared them in many primal-friendly ways, I can’t not have a BLT. I mean, seriously. And all that basil is just begging to be made into pesto and slathered on pasta.

Exercise has fallen completely by the wayside. My toddler has had a wet cough for the past three weeks, which means I haven’t been able to leave her at the gym daycare, so no swimming for me. I’ve been making a point to take long walks, but let’s face it, it’s not the same.

As I’ve lost the two pounds I’d gained the last time I posted, I’m now allowed the full 15 pound gain. I have 26 weeks left in this pregnancy, which means I can gain about half a pound a week. We’ll see how it goes.

This entry was posted on Monday, August 16th, 2010 at 8:51 am and is filed under Blogs, Hippo in a Tutu. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.